The Hidden Blessings of Failed Goals
Happy New Year 2014! Now before you race off and work on your New Year Resolutions, I want to propose a new take on this old tradition. Of course it is great to create new goals and direction for your life but sometimes there is more power and energy by committing to just one core resolution which opens up the opportunities to all of your hearts desires.
I’d like to explain by sharing a little secret…. I totally and utterly failed my 2013 resolution of giving up sugar (as I dip a cookie into my cup of tea).
And guess what? Thank goodness I did!
As a result my life has grown richer and fuller from the experience of failing. Although I can’t say I truly buy into the concept of failure. There really is no such thing. Life is a journey and it’s impossible to fail at something when you believe there are only lessons to learn from and that empower you for next time. If I had remained rigid to my goal I would have been vulnerable to making myself wrong, as we know, this can be crippling to our self-confidence and self-esteem if we fail. As a friend of mine says "If you define life as an opportunity to discover, challenge and befriend yourself then how can you ever possibly lose?" I like this woman.
So after a few months of no sugar I discovered it was becoming more important for me to read the energy of my resolution and uncover the core of what was really driving the goal. By changing my focus from external to internal I channelled more love and acceptance on to myself. I started to speak to myself with kindness and compassion and brought the expectations bar down for myself and in turn others. As you can imagine I hadn’t intended to find greater inner peace on my quest to give up sugar but this one resolution of being accepting of myself has channelled more positive change and opportunities into my life than the absence of sugar ever could have!
So how about you just pick one resolution this year, to be more kind, compassionate and loving to yourself. And from that space you can decide how you wish to direct your life.
P.S. Here are some of my key ‘learnings’ I gratefully received from my journey of unsuccessfully giving up sugar:
- Instead of putting all sugar under one big fat depriving blanket of ‘No’, I learned to say no to processed sugar and yes to natural sugar and step away from my perfectionist (and debilitating) thinking.
- I learned to accept my love of natural sugar (and my faults in the process).
- I discovered I’m a monster without sugar to sweeten my day (apologies again to my husband).
- Accepting I’m a flawed human being by design. (It’s liberating and freeing to not be perfect).
- My change in diet lead to a whole new range of healthy food and cooking skills.
- I can now make healthy ‘faux’ chocolate. (it’s better than the real thing!)
- I discovered Kate, a naturopath who elevated my health to a whole new level of energy (including sugar in my diet ).
- Kate became a dear and cherished friend.
- I witnessed first hand the deceptive brain messages of habit and how to overcome and break their spell.
- I learned sugar wasn’t the culprit to poor energy but gluten and dairy was. (which I effortlessly gave up in March 2013).
- I stood in the face of vulnerability as friends and family’s eyebrows raised over another ‘crazy diet’.
- I built the courage to admit to others that I was back on sugar.
- I’d rather listen and act on my body’s nutritional requests than what the latest ‘food trend’ declares.
- There is no silver bullet to perfect health. It’s all about taking one day at a time.
© Claire Hall & Authentic Empowerment.